Ostrich anyone?

Myth:   Ostriches bury their heads in the sand. 
Fact:    When they sense danger and can't run away, ostriches lay down on the ground and  
           lie still with their heads on the ground in front of them.  Since their neck and 
           head are lightly colored, they blend into the sand giving the appearance of being 
           buried.

Do you ever have those moments where you just want to bury your head and pretend that there is nothing going on around you?   Or you see something coming down the pike, but you want to ignore all the signs and pretend it's not happening?   Maybe you want this thing to happen, and you're scared to hope and believe that it's actually coming?    

I'm having one of those moments.    There are some signs that a long awaited promise may be coming to pass, but I'm scared to believe that the "signs" are real signs and not just the mirages of a thirsty soul.   It's so crazy that I actually had a dream in which I said, "I'm scared to ask the question, because I'm more scared of getting a negative answer than I am of not knowing."     This is so counter-culture for me, because I want to know everything!  I hate unknowns.  I want to know every little detail of every day so I can plan every minute.   I'm not a big fan of surprises.  Knowing all of this about myself, it's crazy that I would actually rather "not know" than ask the question.  

I am asking God to just tell me "yes" or "no", but His silence is blaring.    Why is it so difficult to hear Him for myself, but so easy to perceive what He's doing in others, for nations, for anything?   Could it be I'm too close to the situation?   Could it be that my emotions are too invested?  

Confession:  I'm playing the role of a mythical, head-burying ostrich.  

I want so much to believe that God's promises are good and His timing is perfect.  I know that for a fact in my head and in my past experience.  As I typed that line, this verse from Isaiah 46 just popped in my head:
"Remember the former things of old, for I am God, and there is no other; I am God and there is none like Me, declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times things that are not yet done, saying, 'My counsel shall stand, and I will do all My pleasure'...Indeed I have spoken it; I will also bring it to pass.  I have purposed it; I will also do it."  (vs. 8-11).    

So, there we have it.  God is a God of His word!   What He says, He will do.   Numbers 23:19 tells us that God cannot lie.   I can trust Him completely.     

Confession Number 2:  I can't say that I'm ready to ask the question yet....maybe I'll just be an ostrich for a few more days.